


hentai

by hiyumi



Series: songs that pain me [1]
Category: No Fandom
Genre: Airplane Crashes, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Light Angst, Sad Ending, im sorry, inspired by that cigarettes after sex song, this song pains me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-24 14:41:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30073809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hiyumi/pseuds/hiyumi
Summary: it was selfish of me, to be honest. i knew if i took you to paris, you wouldn’t be able to see her. i thought that perhaps this would make you finally fall in love with me.
Series: songs that pain me [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2212647





	hentai

**Author's Note:**

> for my muse. it's for you, it's always for you.

_beautiful hearts are in your eyes._

_i’ve been waiting for you to fall for me_

_and let me in your life_

_i’ve been waiting for you._

_cigarettes after sex, hentai_

“we are currently asking all passengers to please return to their seats and fasten their seatbelts. we’re experiencing a slight turbulence, but this is very normal and nothing to worry about. thank you.”

i squeezed your hand. of course turbulence is normal, but i obviously can’t help but to get nervous. you grabbed my hand and stroked it with your thumb. i look at you and you smile at me, and just like every time. i smile back, closing my eyes.

we were on our way to paris. it was selfish of me, to be honest. i knew if i took you to paris, you wouldn’t be able to see her. i thought that perhaps this would make you finally fall in love with me. i’ve waited almost exactly a year for you now. it would’ve been exactly 359 days. i knew it was selfish, but this is the first selfish thing i’ve done since we met.

i know you were with her while i was at work, working for our future, working so i could take you out on dates, working so i could make you fall in love with me on this trip to paris, but something in me just wont give up on you. you were with her when i worked on my birthday, you were with her when you said you were busy on our anniversary and on valentines day. but despite all of that, i was willing to wait for you. _i’ve been waiting for you to fall for me and let me in your life_.

i looked out of the window to my left and glanced at the little hole in the window. the snowflakes around it mesmerized me just as much as the scenery. it was sunset, and it was sunny. it was raining below us and i could tell, but we were up here, and it didn’t matter. an hour to paris. i tapped on the snowflakes to get your attention. i looked at you, and you hummed in acknowledgement. you never say much when i tell you things. sometimes, it’s as if you didn’t even listen. so why was i so head over heels for you? why did i make the sacrifices?

the plane rocked again, this time, slightly too much for comfort. the announcements come on again, but there’s only static. a moment passes before the oxygen masks drop. i spun my entire body to look at you, but you were already looking at me with panicked eyes. the calm in your eyes replaced by fear. “ _beautiful hearts are in your eyes._ ” i’d always say. the hearts in your eyes morphed into terror, but i’d be wrong to say you didn’t look ethereal anyways.

they’d say i was insane if they could.

i smiled. the panic slowly fading away from me. it was as if my panic went straight into your body. you looked at me with widened, scared, and tear filled eyes. we were both thinking the same thing, but somehow, our feelings were entirely different. i grabbed your oxygen mask and with as much care as i could with the rocking plane, put it on your face and laughed as i wiped your tear. you said something to me, but i wasn’t listening. i just smiled again before putting on my own mask, only for it to be knocked off with a particularly hard sway.

at this point, there were tears rolling down my face too. maybe i would never get you to fall in love with me in the end. maybe you cried because you thought about how you’d never see her again. maybe you wished you were with her instead. regardless, i kissed you, and for the first time, you kissed back like you meant it. i knew you were confused about why i was smiling so much, but you wouldn’t understand anyways.

i breathed in as much as i could as i stared at you with a bitter look. you were bawling now. i envied that. i envied you could get any tears out. maybe i didn’t cry any more because i wasn’t sad anymore. it’s okay, i thought. it’s okay, everything’s okay. it’s okay because it was doomed from the start. it was doomed from the moment we met. it’s okay because the plane is going down, but i’m the one you’re going down with, and i know i’m the only person you’ll get to do this with. the first and last. the plane fell faster and faster, but i was okay with that because i know that was the moment you fell for me as well. maybe i’ll regret not being able to experience that in the future, but that’s also okay. this is enough. everything up until this moment has been enough.

the last thing i remember is your lips on mine, a whispered “i’m sorry.” that was loud and clear over all the cries and screams of the other passengers. _i’ve been waiting for you_ , and now i don’t have to anymore. till death do us apart, right?

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading :,) kinda proud of this tbh


End file.
